Make Friends With Your Emotions (ALL of Them)!

  • This sounds like an easy thing to do when you’re talking about emotions like Love or Happiness.  These are positive emotions and as I’ve said in previous posts, it takes half the energy to do or think positively than it does being negative.

    But I want us to make friends with ALL of our emotions.  Yes, even the negative ones!  What good would that do us?  Well, making friends with our negative emotions, accepting them for what they are if you like, lessens their power and hold over us.  Once you’ve got that, you can start to think and act in a more rational manner.  Think about what that emotion means to you, analyse where the emotion is coming from.  What is causing it?  In answering that you can do something about the cause so that any symptoms (any inappropriate thoughts or behaviours) will naturally  follow.

    Okay, now I feel I’m probably losing some of you.  After all, I’m suggesting you make friends with negativity that you may have done battle with for many years.  So let me explain a little better using an example.  Take our old friend “Fear”.  Fear, as I’ve said before, is the sub-conscious’ weapon of choice to stop us changing.  One might have a problem and in thinking about it rationally, hypothesise that speaking to a hypnotherapist (or any sort of “talking therapist” for that matter) would assist in addressing that problem.  But when one goes to pick up the phone, our old friend “Fear” puts in an annoying appearance and stops us.  It fosters doubts about the therapy and has us asking questions like “What if I don’t want to open up to the therapist”.  A fear of being out of control (a myth in hypnosis).  A fear of the unknown perhaps.  So why do our minds make us fearful of things that we rationally know we have no need to be fearful of?  One word – PROTECTION!  The mind is constantly trying to protect us from things that it perceives may be a threat to our well-being, either physically or mentally.  Our sub-conscious selves set up a comfort bubble for us and it’s quite happy there thank you very much.  The label that certain behaviours or thinking as inappropriate within this comfort bubble is a cognitive, conscious thought process.  So our minds don’t want us to change or move out of our comfort zones.  There is a protective mechanism going on.  But why is it protecting us?  What is it’s purpose in doing so.  Security, yes.  Safety, yes.  But the overarching purpose?  HAPPINESS!  In being so protective of us, our mind’s overarching goal is that of our happiness!  What a paradox!  Our mind’s are stopping us getting on the plane to see Great Aunt Mildred in Australia (who you’ve not seen in years because you’re aerophobic) because it want’s us to be happy!

    So make friends with the negative emotion!  In a peaceful and loving way, say to it “Thank you for wanting to make me happy, thank you for being there for me and thank you for having my best interests at heart.  I understand and I accept that, but I am here to tell you that it’s inappropriate and the best way of achieving my happiness is to let me attain the goals I set for myself”.  I guarantee that in doing so you’ll lessen it’s power and hold over you and suddenly things will seem a lot more achievable!

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